A Rant on Trust or Lack Thereof.

Okay, trying not to go negative here, but I have something eating at me that I need to vent about. My two best friends have heard enough from me and are supporting me fully, but in an effort to not overload and burn them out as they have plenty of their own stress in their own lives I’m going to unload on all of you.

It all boils down to I got married almost sixteen years ago one week after I graduated High School; of course at that time I thought it was true love with all the birds chirping, sunshine, rainbows etc. As an added bonus my parents hated the guy I married, yes I was just that smart. One of the reasons I rushed into the thing called marriage was my at the time ten month old daughter. Don’t get me wrong, she is seriously the best thing that has ever happened to me; she is beautiful, smart, funny and just an awesome person. I wish I was half as smart and brave as she is, not to mention committed to personal opinions and standing up for myself. She is all of that and so much more. 

Life hasn’t been easy over the years, we’ve had our ups and our downs, and we’ve made it through. The past year has been rough, I was told when I decided to go back to school that he wouldn’t put up with me slacking around the house in favor of school, I’m doing what I can and luckily my kids rock (I also have a thirteen year old son) and are doing what they can to help keep the house running. Me finding a job in Joplin hasn’t helped, but I couldn’t find a job that both allowed me the time for the kids and school as well as enough money to attempt to stay ahead of the bill collectors in Springfield (it’s a long story, another blog post in and of itself).

Things were going tolerably, not great until this past Friday. Early last week, we jointly made a decision to let our daughter drive his GMC Jimmy over to Joplin to join me for the weekend and spend some time with her best friend. All was good in the world until my parents (who tend to be controlling) found out what she had done and where she was and threw a fit. For some background, our daughter has made the trip from Ozark to Carl Junction probably forty times behind the wheel and this was her fifth or sixth trip by herself (just the first my parents found out about). He wound up calling her, yelling at her and demanding to have our friends’ address so he could come get his truck and bring her home Friday night. We made arrangements instead for my friends to bring his truck back to the South side of Springfield and drop it off. In all of this my parents (who back when it was time to get my daughter a car seemingly generously found and paid for one for her) decided she had lied to them by not telling them her weekend plans and came and took her car away. I’m really frustrated by all of this. First by how my parents are being so controlling, this isn’t their daughter, they have no right to punish her. Also she didn’t utilize the car they bought, she talked to both of her parents who agreed to allow her to drive a car we paid for to see her friend (as she has done before). The thing that frustrates me the most is that instead of standing behind his decision and standing up for his daughter my husband allowed my parents to railroad him into recanting the decision we made together and in the way I see it throwing her under the bus to take all the blame.

I’m currently only speaking to my family on a limited basis and feel I can not trust any of them. To say the least this has been a very stressful time and is helping me see some things I have previously been blind to. I think this could even qualify as a life changing event. Sigh. Sorry for ranting, but I needed to get some of this off of my chest.